jñana-vairagya-yuktaya
pasyanty atmani catmanam
bhaktya sruta-grhitaya
The seriously inquisitive student or sage, well equipped with knowledge and detachment, realizes that Absolute Truth by rendering devotional service in terms of what he has heard from the Vedanta-sruti.
Suta Gosvami
SB 1.2.13
varnasrama-vibhagasah
svanusthitasya dharmasya
samsiddhir hari-tosanam
O best among the twice-born, it is therefore concluded that the highest perfection one can achieve by discharging the duties prescribed for one's own occupation according to caste divisions and orders of life is to please the Personality of Godhead.
Suta Gosvami
From Srila Prabhupad Lilamrita -- -Jaladuta diary
September 10, 1965
The Jaladuta is a regular cargo carrier of the Scindia Steam Navigation
Company, but there is a passenger cabin aboard. During the voyage from
Calcutta to New York in August and September of 1965, the cabin was occupied
by "Sri Abhoy Charanaravinda Bhaktivedanta Swami," whose age was listed as
sixty-nine and who was taken on board bearing "a complimentary ticket with
food."
The Jaladuta, under the command of Captain Arun Pandia, whose wife was also
aboard, left at 9:00 A.M. on Friday, August 13. In his diary, Srila
Prabhupada noted: "The cabin is quite comfortable, thanks to Lord Sri
Krishna for enlightening Sumati Morarji for all these arrangements. I am
quite comfortable." But on the fourteenth he reported: "Seasickness,
dizziness, vomiting-Bay of Bengal. Heavy rains. More sickness."
On the nineteenth, when the ship arrived at Colombo, Ceylon (now Sri Lanka),
Prabhupada was able to get relief from his seasickness. The captain took him
ashore, and he traveled around Colombo by car. Then the ship went on toward
Cochin, on the west coast of India. Janmastami, the appearance day of Lord
Krsna, fell on the twentieth of August that year. Prabhupada took the
opportunity to speak to the crew about the philosophy of Lord Krsna, and he
distributed prasadam he had cooked himself. August 21 was his seventieth
birthday, observed (without ceremony) at sea. That same day the ship arrived
at Cochin, and Srila Prabhupada's trunks of Srimad-Bhagavatam volumes, which
had been shipped from Bombay, were loaded on board.
By the twenty-third the ship had put out to the Red Sea, where Srila
Prabhupada encountered great difficulty. He noted in his diary: "Rain,
seasickness, dizziness, headache, no appetite, vomiting." The symptoms
persisted, but it was more than seasickness. The pains in his chest made him
think he would die at any moment. In two days he suffered two heart attacks.
He tolerated the difficulty, meditating on the purpose of his mission, but
after two days of such violent attacks he thought that if another were to
come he would certainly not survive.
On the night of the second day, Prabhupada had a dream. Lord Krsna, in His
many forms, was rowing a boat, and He told Prabhupada that he should not
fear, but should come along. Prabhupada felt assured of Lord Krsna's
protection, and the violent attacks did not recur.
The Jaladuta entered the Suez Canal on September 1 and stopped in Port Sa'id
on the second. Srila Prabhupada visited the city with the captain and said
that he liked it. By the sixth he had recovered a little from his illness
and was eating regularly again for the first time in two weeks, having
cooked his own kichari and puris. He reported in his diary that his strength
renewed little by little.
Thursday, September 9
To 4:00 this afternoon, we have crossed over the Atlantic Ocean for
twenty-four hours. The whole day was clear and almost smooth. I am taking my
food regularly and have got some strength to struggle. There is also a
slight tacking of the ship and I am feeling a slight headache also. But I am
struggling and the nectarine of life is Sri Chaitanya Charitamrita, the
source of all my vitality.
Friday, September 10
Today the ship is plying very smoothly. I feel today better. But I am
feeling separation from Sri Vrindaban and my Lords Sri Govinda, Gopinath,
Radha Damodar. The only solace is Sri Chaitanya Charitamrita in which I am
tasting the nectarine of Lord Chaitanya's lila [pastimes]. I have left
Bharatabhumi just to execute the order of Sri Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati in
pursuance of Lord Chaitanya's order. I have no qualification, but have taken
up the risk just to carry out the order of His Divine Grace. I depend fully
on Their mercy, so far away from Vrindaban.
During the voyage, Srila Prabhupada sometimes stood on deck at the ship's
rail, watching the ocean and the sky and thinking of Caitanya-caritamrta,
Vrndavana-dhama, and the order of his spiritual master to go preach in the
West. Mrs. Pandia, the captain's wife, whom Srila Prabhupada considered to
be "an intelligent and learned lady," foretold Srila Prabhupada's future. If
he were to pass beyond this crisis in his health, she said, it would
indicate the good will of Lord Krsna.
The ocean voyage of 1965 was a calm one for the Jaladuta. The captain said
that never in his entire career had he seen such a calm Atlantic crossing.
Prabhupada replied that the calmness was Lord Krsna's mercy, and Mrs. Pandia
asked Prabhupada to come back with them so that they might have another such
crossing. Srila Prabhupada wrote in his diary, "If the Atlantic would have
shown its usual face, perhaps I would have died. But Lord Krishna has taken
charge of the ship."
On September 13, Prabhupada noted in his diary: "Thirty-second day of
journey. Cooked bati kichari. It appeared to be delicious, so I was able to
take some food. Today I have disclosed my mind to my companion, Lord Sri
Krishna. There is a Bengali poem made by me in this connection."
This poem was a prayer to Lord Krsna, and it is filled with Prabhupada's
devotional confidence in the mission that he had undertaken on behalf of his
spiritual master. An English translation of the opening stanzas follows:See
Apendix for the complete Bengali verses with English translation. *
I emphatically say to you, O brothers, you will obtain your good fortune
from the Supreme Lord Krsna only when Srimati Radharani becomes pleased with
you.
Sri Srimad Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura, who is very dear to Lord
Gauranga [Lord Caitanya], the son of mother Saci, is unparalleled in his
service to the Supreme Lord Sri Krsna. He is that great, saintly spiritual
master who bestows intense devotion to Krsna at different places throughout
the world.
By his strong desire, the holy name of Lord Gauranga will spread throughout
all the countries of the Western world. In all the cities, towns, and
villages on the earth, from all the oceans, seas, rivers, and streams,
everyone will chant the holy name of Krsna.
As the vast mercy of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu conquers all directions, a
flood of transcendental ecstasy will certainly cover the land. When all the
sinful, miserable living entities become happy, the Vaisnavas' desire is
then fulfilled.
Although my Guru Maharaja ordered me to accomplish this mission, I am not
worthy or fit to do it. I am very fallen and insignificant. Therefore, O
Lord, now I am begging for Your mercy so that I may become worthy, for You
are the wisest and most experienced of all...
The poem ends:
Today that remembrance of You came to me in a very nice way. Because I have
a great longing I called to You. I am Your eternal servant, and therefore I
desire Your association so much. O Lord Krsna, except for You there is no
means of success.
In the same straightforward, factual manner in which he had noted the date,
the weather, and his state of health, he now described his helpless
dependence on his "companion, Lord Krishna," and his absorption in the
ecstasy of separation from Krsna. He described the relationship between the
spiritual master and the disciple, and he praised his own spiritual master,
Sri Srimad Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati, "by whose strong desire the holy name
of Lord Gauranga will spread throughout all the countries of the Western
world." He plainly stated that his spiritual master had ordered him to
accomplish this mission of worldwide Krsna consciousness, and feeling
unworthy he prayed to Lord Krsna for strength. The last verses give an
unexpected, confidential glimpse into Srila Prabhupada's direct relationship
with Lord Krsna. Prabhupada called on Krsna as his "dear friend" and longed
for the joy of again wandering the fields of Vraja. This memory of Krsna, he
wrote, came because of a great desire to serve the Lord. Externally, Srila
Prabhupada was experiencing great inconvenience; he had been aboard ship for
a month and had suffered heart attacks and repeated seasickness. Moreover,
even if he were to recover from these difficulties, his arrival in America
would undoubtedly bring many more difficulties. But remembering the desire
of his spiritual master, taking strength from his reading of
Caitanya-caritamrta, and revealing his mind in his prayer to Lord Krsna,
Prabhupada remained confident.
After a thirty-five-day journey from Calcutta, the Jaladuta reached Boston's
Commonwealth Pier . The ship was to stop briefly in Boston before proceeding
to New York City. Among the first things Srila Prabhupada saw in America
were the letters "A & P" painted on a pierfront warehouse. The gray
waterfront dawn revealed the ships in the harbor, a conglomeration of
lobster stands and drab buildings, and, rising in the distance, the Boston
skyline.
Prabhupada had to pass through U.S. Immigration and Customs in Boston. His
visa allowed him a three-month stay, and an official stamped it to indicate
his expected date of departure. Captain Pandia invited Prabhupada to take a
walk into Boston, where the captain intended to do some shopping. They
walked across a footbridge into a busy commercial area with old churches,
warehouses, office buildings, bars, tawdry bookshops, nightclubs, and
restaurants. Prabhupada briefly observed the city, but the most significant
thing about his short stay in Boston, aside from the fact that he had now
set foot in America, was that at Commonwealth Pier he wrote another Bengali
poem, entitled "Markine Bhagavata-dharma" ("Teaching Krsna Consciousness in
America"). Some of the verses he wrote on board the ship that day are as
follows:See Apendix for the complete Bengali verses with English
translation. *
My dear Lord Krsna, You are so kind upon this useless soul, but I do not
know why You have brought me here. Now You can do whatever You like with me.
But I guess You have some business here, otherwise why would You bring me to
this terrible place?
Most of the population here is covered by the material modes of ignorance
and passion. Absorbed in material life they think themselves very happy and
satisfied, and therefore they have no taste for the transcendental message
of Vasudeva [Krsna]. I do not know how they will be able to understand it.
But I know that Your causeless mercy can make everything possible, because
You are the most expert mystic.
How will they understand the mellows of devotional service? O Lord, I am
simply praying for Your mercy so that I will be able to convince them about
Your message.
All living entities have come under the control of the illusory energy by
Your will, and therefore, if You like, by Your will they can also be
released from the clutches of illusion.
I wish that You may deliver them. Therefore if You so desire their
deliverance, then only will they be able to understand Your message...
How will I make them understand this message of Krsna consciousness? I am
very unfortunate, unqualified, and the most fallen. Therefore I am seeking
Your benediction so that I can convince them, for I am powerless to do so on
my own.
Somehow or other, O Lord, You have brought me here to speak about You. Now,
my Lord, it is up to You to make me a success or failure, as You like.
O spiritual master of all the worlds! I can simply repeat Your message. So
if You like You can make my power of speaking suitable for their
understanding.
Only by Your causeless mercy will my words become pure. I am sure that when
this transcendental message penetrates their hearts, they will certainly
feel gladdened and thus become liberated from all unhappy conditions of
life.
O Lord, I am just like a puppet in Your hands. So if You have brought me
here to dance, then make me dance, make me dance, O Lord, make me dance as
You like.
I have no devotion, nor do I have any knowledge, but I have strong faith in
the holy name of Krsna. I have been designated as Bhaktivedanta, and now, if
You like, You can fulfill the real purport of Bhaktivedanta.
Signed-the most unfortunate, insignificant beggar,
A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami,
On board the ship Jaladuta, Commonwealth Pier,
Boston, Massachusetts, U.S.A.
Dated 18th September 1965.
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